Friday, November 2, 2007

I take it that my plan is accepted.

I thought I was a retired birthday challenger; he operative word there being "retired". But as long as George is still out there to chase I guess it's time to put down the Wild Turkey and get my friend Ben to whip my ass into shape. Beat it, Buns.

I have three weeks to train. I always seem to have three weeks. I guess this is because I can't plan anything further away than this. Hey, it was enough for last year's challenge (or almost), to make the US Duathlon Team in 2004, do the Everest Challenge in 2005, and for Hemlock to wipe out three guys on the Eiger. It'll do.

This challenge will happen in the vicinity of Ben Beaumon's climbing school in Zion over the Thankgiving holiday. What it entails hasn't been uncovered yet but Pope tells me that C 2 has their best people working on it. Regardless of what they uncover, it looks as though I'm going to have to go through with the climb.

The theme of the challenge is on sight. I mean, what kind of mystery would it be if I knew where I was going? The time limit will be one full day. The elements to include:

Climbing 47 routes on sight.
Riding 47 miles of unseen single track (must be rated advanced) on my single speed
Riding 47 miles of road on my fixie
Running 47 kilometers of unknown trail

sustinance to include:

Wild Turkey
Broiled steak
Chocolate (only if sliced with a switchblade)
French onion soup
Crab meat cocktail
Broiled lobster tails


Aaron Baker said...

An onsite challenge! Brilliant! There should be a rule, however, that whoever proposes an aspect of your day (biking, climbing, running, etc.) has to do that section with you. If they blow, you get to move on to the next challenge.

Anonymous said...

Sorry I won’t be able to see it all go down sweetheart.

I always like to be there for my pals. This year I will be out of the country on a mission. Actually I’m on my way to pick-up my disguise right now. It’s hard to find good trench coats these days.
About the climbing part of the challenge…….. In your opinion do men climb to prove their manhood, or is it more a matter of compensating for inferiority feelings? Whatever the reasons good luck buddy.
M. Ayon

steve edwards said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
steve edwards said...

Don't call me buddy, pal, or sweetheart. Out the door or out the window. It's your choice.

cherie said...

you are totally insane! if i could climb, i would join you. instead i'm going to run the nyc marathon on sunday, which seems much tamer somehow...

josh said...

I think the booze should be onsight too. Only bourbon and beer you've never had before. Hell, it'll be a challenge just finding such things.

Steve Z Photography said...

Maybe by the time you are 50 you'll learn to be nice to yourself!

Carl Daikeler said...

I would like to respectfully suggest that you also get 47 people to train (WOWY) with you during the 3 week lead-up...

Self-servingly yours,

Steve Godbey said...

most excellent! make sure to spice up the broiled steak... this challenge isn't for the weak of heart. oh, and the trail run must be in sandals. :)

good luck!

steve godbey

... pacers

Anonymous said...

Hey Steve,
it sounds like time has very little effect on you, only making you a little nuttier each year! Good luck (Naaah, luck has nothing to do with it) Bon courage (That, you'll need)!

Michel Le Duff

Anonymous said...

Well, that should be a walk in the park - there are no fritters involved!!


Anonymous said...

No dice.
I'll be conducting an ad-hoc, sober but stoney surfing clinic in the seas off of Santa Barbara for all interested parties, from gremmies to Kahuna's and all
levels in between. Participants can expect little attention, less instruction and being shoved off on
their own into treacherous, life threatening conditions with no support or safety back-up
whatsoever; in short, the eashless soul surfing experience that once defined our fabled sport, in an
era of Times Square surf coture super stores that sell 10,000 tee shirts for every surfboard to ripper kooks who see surfing as a Carnival Cruise day-trip package
and reminisce over amaretto lattes about the big one that got away.
I got your big one right here.
--Jan Michael Vincent

Anonymous said...

speed be with you.

Anonymous said...

What is a climbing school? If you want yer ass whipped into shape,
well I can do that right here in our very own home town. I've got a point system for the crag, feet climbed and problems solved system for the gym.
And I bet I could drink you under the table in the process. I'm in the passenger seat of the passat, drinking a Swyllinder of Modelo. This is a rare variety of Swyllinder as they are usually domestic piss (Papst aside), Bud, Natty ice, Busch, etc. Although a single Bud Ice consumed after a long day at the crag without food can produce a crushing buzz that will put you to bed by nine.
- Brittany

Anonymous said...

sounds like fun! i'll see if Amanda (the Shredder!) is into it. we're pretty stoked on staying local this holiday season, saving some cash, playing hard in the back yard. climbing and biking on sandstone though, man, now that's something. i'll be sure to watch the blog to see how this develops.